Suggestions For Sony Special @ Gaming Target

Written by John Scalzo on April 10, 2002

Special: What Dennis Miller would be like if he talked about video games

The PlayStation 2 has seen the release of 258 games in it's short lifespan. A lot of them are high quality titles that will go down in the annals of video game history forever. Yet, the PlayStation 2 is not a perfect animal. Sony continues to gloss over many of the problems that have been with the machine since day one. Repeating the familiar mantra: we have the most games. That is all well and good, games are obviously required for a video game system, but some things go beyond games.

Fourplay
Look back over those 258 games again. Notice anything? How about the complete and utter lack of good 4 player games? Sure the PS2 boasts a couple, like Twisted Metal Black, 007: Agent Under Fire, and most sports games. But then look at the competition. Halo. Project Gotham Racing. Super Smash Bros Melee. Mario Kart 64 (granted it's kind of old, but good multiplayer never gets old). These are event games. Games you'd call over a bunch of friends for so you could start talking trash to each other until only one is left standing. This sorry situation has basically come about because Sony just doesn't get it when it comes to 4 player games. Buying a Multitap is a hassle and an unnecessary step. However, this does not have to be.

Sony did see fit to add two big, inviting USB ports on the front of the PS2. These ports hold that place to one day turn your PS2 into a full fledged computer by enabling a keyboard, mouse, printer, whatever, to be able to hook in those ports. Right now though, keyboard and mouse support is minimal at best and the only real use that USB port gets is the occasional gamer that jerry rigs an online Tony Hawk 3 session.

So here's my suggestion to Sony. Create a USB version of the Dual Shock controller. BAM! Two new instant controller ports and the 4 player Berlin Wall goes tumbling down. Everybody sing it with me: "Come on people now, smile on your brother. Everybody get together, try to love one another right now." Creating a USB Dual Shock wouldn't be that difficult and for all you greedy corporate types it makes perfect business sense as well. People will buy less Multitaps, but two more controllers. And because the USB standard is known to be flexible, I'm sure a little tweaking is all that would be needed to make a USB Dual Shock compatible with PCs. For those keeping track at home, that's a whole new market.

Of course, I'm just suggesting it. It's up to Sony to make it happen.

Memory Loss
If you've been following the game news lately you might have come across this little tidbit: there is a shortage of PS2 Memory Cards. Yup, these little buggers, which are required to use the PlayStation 2, are harder to come by than a movie critic that enjoyed Resident Evil. So I put the shortage news to the test. I traversed my local mall, which features one GameStop, one Electronics Boutique, one Sears (hidden jewel of obscure game stuff), and one KB Toys. All of these fine stores carry a wide assortment of PS2 merchandise and not one single memory card. Next stop, Best Buy, strike 2. Down the street at CompUSA, strike 3. It took a trip further down the street to Circuit City until I finally found one. I actually found seven at Circuit City, so maybe they're hording their share.

Seven stores. Seven Memory Cards. And not one per store. Maybe it was a fluke. Maybe it was delivery day and the new shipment hadn't come in yet. Or maybe Sony should be packing Memory Cards in with every PS2 they sell. It's unacceptable that 18 months after a system's launch and it's still hard to find Memory Cards. So here's my suggestion to Sony. Start packing Memory Cards in with new systems and start shipping more Memory Cards out to manufacturers. I've long believed that if something is needed to use a system, it should be included in the box. This is not just a suggestion to Sony, but a suggestion to Nintendo and Microsoft too (why? I mean there's a hard drive in the Xbox you know Ц Ed). Start packing Memory Cards in the box. Although, all seven of those stores did have GameCube and Xbox Memory Cards available.

Of course, I'm just suggesting it. It's up to Sony (and Microsoft and Nintendo) to make it happen.

Magnetic Attraction
I've gone over the strengths and limitations of the PS2's DVD playback abilities several times now. But there's one thing that keeps nagging at me about them. I can't rent movies for my PS2. I mean I can physically rent movies for my PS2, but there's something with those magnetic security strips some rental places put on the discs. They cause an imbalance inside the PS2 and make the discs spin weird. So as soon as that layer change hits, the laser hits the wrong spot making the disc skip to my Lou. So basically the entire chapter with the layer change in it is unwatchable. That's a best-case scenario. At worst, the entire second half of the movie won't play. Then you have to take into account scratches and whether it's one of the PS2's "problem" discs, it's a whole process.

Combined with the whole every PS2 has a different set of problems makes this an even harder problem to diagnose. Some will have it worse than I do. Some will have no problems with those security strips. The only foolproof way to make sure all your discs is to buy them brand new.

So here's my suggestion to Sony. Manufacture all the PS2s the same. I'm sick of this every PS2 has it's own set of problems thing. If there's a problem, I want to know what it is so I can fix it. Not jumping through hoops as I try to figure out is it just some random failure, is my PS2 really broken, or is it manufactured badly and it'll take a game of 200 questions to find out what's wrong with it.

Of course, I'm just suggesting it. It's up to Sony to make it happen.

Last Words
They say that one man can't make a difference. But one crazy man, on the Internet, oh look out. Of course this is all just my opinion. I could be wrong. And I'm waiting for Dennis Miller to sue me any day now.